Trusting God with an Untrustworthy Husband
by Shauna Wallace
I read about a husband who lied to cover his own hide and left his wife totally exposed to a bigamist’s advances. Infuriating is one words that comes time mind, along with a question: what do we do when our husband’s choices put us in vulnerable situations?
This wasn’t a tabloid story. It’s in the Bible, and it’s reality-TV worthy scandalous stuff!
After God calls Abraham to leave his country and family to become the father of many nations and patriarch of the family of God, Abraham boldly obeys and hits the trail. When he comes to Gerar, he fears for his life because the beauty of his wife, Sarah, thinking, “surely the fear of God is not in this place; and they will kill me on account of my wife.” (Genesis 20:11 NKJV)
So he lies, and tells Abimelech, king of Gerar, that Sarah is his sister. Naturally, the king takes Sarah with all intention to make her a wife.
I’ll give you a moment, because I’m still steaming!
Can you imagine if your husband were to lie to protect himself, and as a result, you are taken by a total stranger to be his wife, and likely one of many? Because your husband is selfishly concerned for his own life, he sets you up to be the one to suffer.
Doesn’t this happen in marriages all the time? (And listen, it can go both ways. We as wives can be just as selfishly dishonest, manipulative, and destructive.)
So can we trust God to take care of us when our husbands aren’t? Will He protect us and act in our best interest when our husbands aren’t? Because honestly, isn’t that one of the most common reasons we become controlling and manipulative, whiny and nagging, is because we don’t trust God to move on our behalf, so we take things into our own hands?
I pray none of us misses what God does for Sarah, and because He does it for her, we can trust Him to do it for us. As wives can take great comfort in the covering of the Lord!
Even if our husbands are doing nothing, God can do anything, and if our husbands are doing wrong things, we can trust God to make everything right, despite.
Watch what happens.
God appears to Abimelech in a dream in verse 3, and says, “Indeed you are a dead man because of the woman whom you have taken, for she is a man’s wife.”
Abimelech defends his innocence, insisting he had no idea, because guess what? Sarah lied to cover Abraham’s hide, too! She went along with his scheme, and still, God has her back.
In his defense, Abimelech lets God know Sarah herself claimed Abraham as her brother, insisting, “In the integrity of my heart and innocence of my hands I have done this.” (Genesis 20:5 NKJV) Thankfully, he had not yet come near her, and in verse 6, we learn why: “For I (God) also withheld you from sinning against Me; therefore I did not let you touch her.”
God withheld evil from Sarah when her husband would not.
If your husband acts in a way that leaves you insecure and vulnerable, God sees you. God sees Him.
As God’s child, you are first and foremost His before you are your husband’s, and as your defender and shield, He is always watching over you and moving in people and circumstances on your behalf.
Imagine Sarah. Taken. She knows why. She knows what’s coming. This stranger is going to consummate marriage with whom he sees as a legitimate wife. Sarah doesn’t know God is restraining him. She has no idea what God is doing behind the scenes in the man’s dreams.
How would you feel? Vulnerable? Exposed? Unprotected? Angry? Scared? Maybe a little like you do now when you see your husband making decisions that could have significant ramifications on your marriage, children, finances, home, security, etc.?
Can I encourage you to trust God? He can show up even in dreams and withhold others from sinning against Him by harming us.
Don’t miss this. If the king had slept with Sarah, his sin would have been against God, and God protected him because of his innocence. The king was innocent, not Abraham. Had Abimelech violated Sarah, he would have done so under the deceit of her husband, and God protected this innocent man from sinning against Himself, all the while protecting Sarah.
God will do the same for you.
You can trust Him.
He is trustworthy.
Much love and many blessings,
Women are drawn to Shauna’s teaching and Bible studies because of her in-depth yet conversational and practical approach to scripture’s truths as they apply to the nitty-gritty of daily life. The more she studies the Bible, the greater her grasp of God’s grace and love and the deeper her passion to see others experience the power and freedom of surrendering entirely to Him. She is a wife, mother and working woman who gladly and transparently connects with women wherever they are by sharing the good, bad and challenging of her life story, past, and present. Learn more at www.shaunawallace.com.