The Truth About Sex
By Drenda Keesee
If God made sex then why are those who believe in Him so reluctant to talk about it? Money and sex are the two most taboo subjects in the faith community, yet are the two areas that the enemy of our souls uses to destroy lives! Sex and money sell, so every form of media is full of both. Yet we refuse, as people of faith, to counter the lies about sex and money that the culture feeds us. I’m tired of young women and married women believing these lies, and I’m tired of seeing those lies destroy marriages, children’s lives, and the hope of lasting, intimate love.
So what are some of the lies about sex?
WRONG. The truth: Sex is holy, and the best sex is married sex! Sex is spiritual and goes much deeper than a physical act. The oneness a couple can experience in a committed-to-true-love-for-life commitment frees both persons to truly know each other. The greatest sex comes from trying to please your mate while they are trying to out-please you so that you are caught up in ecstasy.Lie 2: There are “75 moves or positions he’ll love.”WRONG. The truth: Cosmo and other magazines have been saying this stuff for years. I asked my husband about the “75 moves and positions.” He chuckled and said, “That’s ridiculous. Men can’t keep up with 10 things much less 75! But we can try if you want (with a grin).” Yet, women buy it every time. We help magazines make a fortune and all the while we feel like we don’t have what it takes to please our man. Ridiculous.
Lie 3: If a woman gives a man her body, he will love her and commit to marriage.
WRONG. The truth: Men who have a “try it before they buy it” attitude rarely commit afterward. In addition, the Bible tells us that each time a person has sexual intercourse with a person they are spiritually connected to that person and lose a part of themselves. Scary!
Lie 4: If a woman doesn’t have a perfect body, fake breasts, perfect legs, etc., then she can’t satisfy her man.
WRONG. The truth: Very few women think they have a perfect body—even the ones that we may say are perfect! Whatever your shape and build, you can be sexually attractive to your mate. Being available and open to loving and building him as a man is more important than having a perfect body. Your man married you for a reason. Make him feel adored, respected, and like he’s a priority in your life.
For additional mentorship on sex and what it is supposed to look like in a Godly relationship, I recommend you request your copy of The Dirt on Sex by Amy Freudiger (For teens and young women) and or For Women Only by Drenda Keesee (For married women). Get answers to the tough questions that everyone else is too embarrassed to ask!
Listen in Now to Faith Life Church!
Drenda Keesee’s contagious zeal and humorous personal experiences help make her ministry of spiritual, emotional and relational wholeness one that will bless your life and spark a new fire in your spirit.
A wife of over 30 years and a mother of five children, Drenda has ministered at churches, seminars, and conferences, and through the mediums of television and radio, for more than 20 years.
Her books, The New Vintage Family, Better Than You Think, and She Gets It are available wherever books are sold. In these heartfelt books, Drenda shares her personal journey and the life lessons that have brought her to where she is today, as well as practical answers that all people need to live a joyful life.
Drenda and her husband Gary founded Faith Life Now, a ministry designed to spread the message of freedom in the areas of finances, faith, marriage and family. Faith Life Now hosts conferences worldwide, and sponsors both Fixing the Money Thing, which Drenda co-hosts with her husband Gary, and Drenda.
Through their own life experiences, the Keesees have found the principles from God’s Word to be powerful and effective. At one point, Drenda was a young, suicidal feminist with no hope of ever being “good enough” for her own standards of perfection. She never wanted the “inconvenience” of a husband or children, and she was on her own path to success. But the stress of trying to achieve perfection and perform for love left her broken and used. She had success, but it was nothing compared to the pain and loneliness it had also brought.
That’s when God got a hold of her heart. It was there—at her lowest point—that she found the One who accepted and loved her, faults and all. Since that transformation, Drenda has had a passion to reach women who find themselves where she once was.
She married Gary after attending college, and there she found herself in a personal boot camp of sorts. She says, “I cried and told God, ‘I can do anything but be a wife and mother.’” She committed to learning how to do it God’s way. Through the many years of raising their children and struggling to make ends meet, Drenda learned from their mistakes. “I didn’t know how to be a wife and mother, but God saved our marriage, taught us how to parent our children for success, showed us how to have financial success, and then irony of all ironies, He called us to ministry.” It’s truly because of these life experiences that Drenda can now share so many insightful principles for people who are now going through the same struggles.