Maybe you’ve spent the day cuddling your sweet newborn. You’re looking forward to a night of sweet baby sounds as your little one coos in your arms. Or, maybe you’ve spent all day walking around with a cranky child. You’re covered in milk and tears and tonight isn’t looking very promising.
Neither situation leaves you very open to the winks (or pleading looks) your husband gives when he arrives home. How can you take care of your marriage with a baby in the mix? This article will cover some tried-and-true strategies for staying in touch with your man – even if you feel touched out.
This Too Shall Pass
Remember that the newborn period, especially the first six weeks, is intense. Many parents find there’s not much time to do anything except focus on this new little person. That’s okay. Give it time.
Connect in simple ways – a quick meal shared together, laughing (or crying) together at that awesome blow-out diaper your baby just had. You might even find tender moments, like when your husband cuts up your dinner so you can nurse the baby.
Make it a Movie Night
Movie night at home can work really well with a baby. Newborns will often snooze through a movie and you can cuddle on the couch or in bed. Older babies may be content to explore the room around you. Or, maybe you’ve mastered the bedtime routine and you can enjoy the film together while baby sleeps blissfully in the next room.
Pick something romantic, get a snack together, and enjoy a few moments snuggled close. Sometimes an action-adventure or an epic drama can help you both escape and unwind together.
Take a Stroll
You’ve got a cranky baby, and there is no way you’ll be sitting down for supper anytime soon – and forget dinner and a movie! This is the perfect time to take a walk with your man. Get yourself and baby dressed for the weather and go.
A baby carrier makes it easy to soothe your baby, or have Daddy push the stroller. Use this time to chat and enjoy the sights and sounds around you.
My husband and I have six children and a short evening walk together is one of the most powerful ways we reconnect. I wear our youngest in our backpack carrier, hold my husband’s hand, and feel spontaneous and romantic again. It’s okay that the walk is actually scheduled 😉
Let Him Help
Your husband probably wants to help – and letting him do so is a great way to light a spark! It’s okay if you know he’s putting the baby’s diaper on backwards. Bite your tongue and think about how awesome it is to have an involved man.
When we stop trying to get dads to do it all our way, we often realize they do a pretty good job with both the kids and the home. You hubby may do things a different way, but that’s okay. It lightens your load and it can really make a big difference in how you feel about your relationship with him.
Slip Into the Shower
5 – 10 minutes in the shower together is a fun way to reconnect with your husband. It gives you a little time for some talking and flirting without any pressure to perform (though you could take a quick detour to the bedroom if you both desire)! Plus you have a captive audience during an otherwise busy day.
Having your husband wash your hair for you can be sensual and help you feel really pampered. You can scrub his back or just enjoy his company while you chat. Baby can sit in a bouncy seat or lie on a thick towel during this time, close enough to hear your voice while you have a few minutes to focus on your hubby.
Consider Your Priorities
A new baby is all-consuming and in the early weeks; that’s natural and healthy. As your baby gets older and life starts to settle down, though, making finding moments with your husband a priority. You don’t have to schedule dates and leave your baby at home (I’ve never felt comfortable with that until my baby was a year or so – and with six kids date nights on the town are rare!).
You can still be purposeful about finding ways to connect with your husband at home. Use these suggestions and look for quick ways to show your love and respect for him: thank him for his hard work, slip a note in when you pack his lunch, rub his shoulders for a moment when you walk by where he’s sitting – the possibilities are there if you look for them! (Pinterest is full of great “date night” ideas!)
Show your hubby your love and appreciation and enjoy your marriage to its fullest! That sets a beautiful example for your children – and it creates a priceless sense of security and safety for the whole family.
-Kristen Burgess
About Kristen-
My name is Kristen, and I have six beautiful children and have had wonderful, natural births with each of them. I’ve learned a lot over the course of my pregnancies and births and I’m incredibly passionate about helping families bring healthy babies into the world.
Check out my website: http://www.naturalbirthandbabycare.com
