Five Steps to Inspire Women to Live Their Best Life
by Stephanie Pletka
What if it’s possible that who you are is who you are meant to be? Perhaps you’re looking for an answer, looking for a fresh start, for someone to tell you that you’re doing a great job, that what you’re doing matters, that you’re not the only one going through tough times. I’ve been there. I’ve been the mom who struggles to find some semblance of her old life, as I walk into the new one.
The one who cried all the tears because of an Ending, yet saw hopefulness in the New Beginnings it created. I’ve been the mom who is questioning if what I am doing is right. If what I’m doing is enough. If someone else could do a better job raising my kids. I’ve written a book, Living Your Best Life: Letting Go of the Self-Doubt, Fear and Other’s Expectations to Live the Life You’ve Always Dreamed, to remind moms to see the small wins that become the big wins. To remind them to chase their dreams and write their story.
Here’s 5 tips to adding safety nets in place to empower you to Live Your Best Life.
- Stop Comparing – We tend to look to the left and right to compare ourselves, as a measuring stick of success. We compare our kids, our house, the car we drive. We think everyone else is doing it better. Self-doubt says we should be further along in life, that someone else could do a better job raising our kids. We may see a mom in carpool talking to the principal and think, aw, ‘She’s prettier, than me.’ Stop throwing yourself under the bus. Just say: She is pretty. Period. Comparison creates discontentment, that’s when we believe the grass is greener, elsewhere, when it’s only greener where you water it.
- Create Breathing Room – This is the space between the road and the cliff’s edge to give yourself margin. Layout the clothes the night before. There’s nothing like looking for that left shoe you can’t seem to find, that catapults you into a frenzy. For me, breathing room looks like a walk around the lake, a hike, driving alone in my car, singing to my favorite music. It’s important to hear your voice, to hear God’s voice, to reflect – Living life to the FULL instead of living life to the BUSY.
- Establish Boundaries – This a line drawn to put parameters in place to protect your life. When someone crosses those boundaries, they become a Trespasser. Check out Dr. Henry Cloud’s Books: Boundaries and Necessary Endings. These lines can’t be drawn in secret. The world needs to know, like a puppy that walks the parameters of its yard. Those little red flags show him the safe areas to walk. There’s freedom in boundaries. When they cross over, there are consequences. For a friend who trespasses, you might say: this is how this made me feel. A true friend will not repeat the offense. They will probably reply with: “Oh, my goodness, I’m sorry, it wasn’t my intention” and you move on, better, stronger. But one with lesser intentions, will continue to overstep. That’s when you choose to walk a different path.
- Don’t Let Their No, be Your No – We all have dreams and desires and not everyone will understand; and that’s ok. Chase them anyway. A publisher may say NO to a book deal, a boss may say NO to a promotion. Keep building, writing and creating. They are not the BE ALL – END ALL to your story. They don’t have that kind of power, unless you give it. They are just a small road-block along the path to greatness. Re-route and carry on.
- Find Your Tribe – It’s said you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. I want to be the lowest common denominator in that group. There are incredible women everywhere. We just have to seek them out. Some might say: What if I’m shy or not outgoing. However you come to the table, quietly, joining a book club or loudly stepping out to join a tennis team, get out there. It might look like saying “Hello” in a room full of women you don’t know, to spark a conversation. Choose women who will take those tough moments and walk life with you, instead of gossip. You only need 2 or 3. What is life, without Connection and Community?
God reminds us in Ephesians 2:10 that We are His Masterpiece, created to do great works. He didn’t say you were average or so-so, but his Masterpiece. He believes in you, now go and believe in yourself. Straighten that crown and warrior on. Here’s to endings creating new beginnings, to living your life to the full instead of to the busy. You’re a mess and a masterpiece. But girl, you have always been enough.
Stephanie Pletka is a writer, speaker and entrepreneur whose passion is to help women live an authentic life. She uses her infectious storytelling to connect with and empower women to take control of their lives. A Southern girl who loves the great outdoors, Stephanie and her husband hit the road for a life of adventure. They homeschooled their four kids and ran a tech company while traveling to 45 states and 9 countries. They now reside in Scottsdale, Arizona, exploring the beauty of the West. For more information, visit StephaniePletka.com.