A Polaroid Snapshot Pt 2
By Drenda Keesee
(An excerpt from Drenda’s book The New Vintage Family)
Many are feeling an emptiness in the changes in our world, and they are longing for the “good old days.” They want the loving Dick-Van-Dyke father at the door, home from work, saying, “Honey, I’m home!” They want the nurturing mother in her red-checkered apron and matching red lipstick who has dinner set on the table. And they want the whole household sitting around a table, exchanging stories over dinner. They want the vintage image because it was simple. The past has become a new craze with youth. Because many teenagers didn’t grow up with a whole family or a value system, they are obsessed with eras that featured a strong family image.
Fads such as thrifting, becoming a hipster, and even wearing vintage fashions have become popular. People want to know what it was like to live in simpler times. What is it like to shop in a little store? What is it like to eat an organic meal free of chemicals, pesticides, and fillers? Parents who grew up watching black-and-white ’50s TV Land shows that depict families working together want that for themselves. The problem is, to have this you have to embrace the principles that built the vintage family. They can’t get the fruit without the seed. In the absence of principles, many fathers have abandoned their families, searching after their own pleasure. A disturbing number of moms, who were hardwired by God to care for and nurture their families, are abandoning their children emotionally and leaving them to care for themselves. And many families hardly communicate, let alone share a meal together. We used to hear about “troubled teens,” but now it’s elementary and middle school children. Kids are growing up faster because they are exposed to adult problems younger and to pain they were never meant to bear.
They are in turn doing things such as cutting themselves (revealing the pain they inwardly carry), struggling with eating disorders, rebelling and running away from their homes, denying their identity, and committing suicide. All of these troubles are not the real problem—they are symptoms of the root problem—the breakdown of the family. Many parents want the best for their children; they just don’t know how to give it to them. That’s because nobody took the time to train them on how to parent. When it’s all said and done, family is what matters the most—yet it is one of the areas many people are the least prepared for. There are processes and principles that set you up for greater success in parenting, and when you apply them, family life can be fun again! I want to take a look at the vintage model that made it work. What were the components of it? What was family life like? How can you achieve those same results in your modern family? Tune in for more excerpts of this book. It is going to give you the dynamic tools you need to transform your family life and repurpose your family to receive God’s best!
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Drenda Keesee’s contagious zeal and humorous personal experiences help make her ministry of spiritual, emotional and relational wholeness one that will bless your life and spark a new fire in your spirit.
A wife of over 30 years and a mother of five children, Drenda has ministered at churches, seminars, and conferences, and through the mediums of television and radio, for more than 20 years.
Her books, The New Vintage Family, Better Than You Think, and She Gets It are available wherever books are sold. In these heartfelt books, Drenda shares her personal journey and the life lessons that have brought her to where she is today, as well as practical answers that all people need to live a joyful life.
Drenda and her husband Gary founded Faith Life Now, a ministry designed to spread the message of freedom in the areas of finances, faith, marriage, and family. Tune in for their weekly messages here. Faith Life Now hosts conferences worldwide, and sponsors both Fixing the Money Thing, which Drenda co-hosts with her husband Gary, and Drenda.
Through their own life experiences, the Keesees have found the principles from God’s Word to be powerful and effective. At one point, Drenda was a young, suicidal feminist with no hope of ever being “good enough” for her own standards of perfection. She never wanted the “inconvenience” of a husband or children, and she was on her own path to success. But the stress of trying to achieve perfection and perform for love left her broken and used. She had success, but it was nothing compared to the pain and loneliness it had also brought.
That’s when God got a hold of her heart. It was there—at her lowest point—that she found the One who accepted and loved her, faults and all. Since that transformation, Drenda has had a passion to reach women who find themselves where she once was.
She married Gary after attending college, and there she found herself in a personal boot camp of sorts. She says, “I cried and told God, ‘I can do anything but be a wife and mother.’” She committed to learning how to do it God’s way. Through the many years of raising their children and struggling to make ends meet, Drenda learned from their mistakes. “I didn’t know how to be a wife and mother, but God saved our marriage, taught us how to parent our children for success, showed us how to have financial success, and then irony of all ironies, He called us to ministry.” It’s truly because of these life experiences that Drenda can now share so many insightful principles for people who are now going through the same struggles.