9 Secrets I Learned from Happily Married Women
By Rhonda Stoppe
To be happily married––is this the longing of your heart? I know this was my desire as a young bride, but because I had no healthy marriages in my own family to learn from, I was unsure of how to make this happen.
As life’s responsibilities pressed in, I realized I was not the fun-loving, joy-filled wife I had hoped to be. So I cried out to the Lord for help. He sent to me several older ladies in my church––ladies who were Titus 2 women.
And what did these godly women teach me? Were they quick to rattle off a list of things I needed to change? No. First, these wonderfully wise women befriended me.
Then, over time, as these women became my friends, they were able to discern what I needed to learn from them so they could help me learn how to be a better wife. And their insights were life-changing. Here are some of my favorite pointers from my Titus 2 friends…
- Take a nap when the baby sleeps so you are not too tired to stay up with your husband after the children go to bed. A well-rested wife is a joyful wife.
- Keep your house clean, but don’t obsess over making it so perfect your husband is not comfortable in his own home.
- Never, ever raise your voice to your husband. Speak calmly and quietly when you are in disagreement because “a soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1).
- Always guard your husband’s reputation. Never talk behind his back.
- Never belittle or make fun of your husband.
- Make time to enjoy each other.
- Fight for joy, because “the joy of the LORD is your strength” (Nehemiah 8:10).
- Pray for your husband.
- Love God’s Word and study it daily, and commit to applying its truths to your life. God’s Word will be a lamp to your feet and a light to your path (see Psalm 119:105).
The last point is the most important one I learned—to love God’s Word. As I studied the Bible each week with these women and they helped me apply God’s truth to my life, I began to be transformed by the renewing of my mind (Romans 12:2).
My thinking became different. As a result, my marriage became different as well—for the better. Life’s experiences were being filtered through God’s truth, and that truth was changing who I was.
Rhonda Stoppe is the NO REGRETS WOMAN. With more than 20 years experience of helping women live life with no regrets.
Visit NoRegretsWoman.com to order Rhonda Stoppe’s books: MOMS RAISING SONS TO BE MEN which is mentoring thousands of moms to guide sons toward a no-regrets life. And her new book IF MY HUSBAND WOULD CHANGE I’D BE HAPPY-And Other Myths Wives Believe (Harvest House Publishers) is helping countless women build no-regrets marriages. As a pastor’s wife, speaker, and author, Rhonda has helped women to:
- Discover significance and purpose for their lives
- Impact the moral fiber of the next generation by raising children with integrity
- Find victory over people-pleasing
- Experience a No Regrets Marriage
- Build an incredible legacy
- Become more influential than they ever dreamed possible
 Stoppe, If My Husband Would Change I’d Be Happy (Harvest House 2015)
 Stoppe, Moms Raising Sons to Be Men (Harvest House Publishers 2013)